The Westminster Rizz List 2023: Which MPs have 'rizz'?

You’ll no doubt be aware that Oxford University Press have declared 2023’s word of the year to be “rizz”, defined as to have charm or attractiveness. Let’s face it, there aren’t many MPs who put the “rizz” in “charisma”. And we don’t even have sexymp.co.uk anymore for those on the green benches to determinedly and objectively insist that they have it.

The whole point of this particular charisma – generally used to attract a romantic partner, which in this context is, I think, best left to certain political fiction – is effortlessness. You have rizz or you don’t. Once in a blue moon you land on a politician who is just cool without consciously thinking about it. But the hideous result of one actually trying to seem authentic or relatable, of caring too much about seeming cool, is the antithesis of rizz: cringe. Think Barack Obama’s “Yes we can” vs Ed Miliband’s “Hell yes I’m tough enough”.

So where does that leave us with the rizz factor of the current House of Commons? It’s slim pickings, to be sure, but there are a few notables that deserve some examination. 

 

 

Angela Rayner
Unlike your average top tier politician, she’s only had a boob job, which is to say she isn’t doing a boob job. Unaffected, fun and feisty in private as well as in public, she’s a genuine fox, from the hair down.

 

 

 

Dan Jarvis
I don’t recall ever hearing the man say a word but the strong, silent thing really works for him. 

 

 

 

 

 

Wes Streeting
Great hair and the skin of a 25 year-old. He manages to land some hard truths without sounding finger waggy. Even Tory voters consider him something of a, how to put this, Rizz Streeting…?

 

 

 

Laura Trott and Laura Farris
Softly but firmly spoken, simply but chicly dressed. They are two members of the 2019 intake to watch, not least for styling tips.

 

 

 

 

 

Harriet Harman
Old school rizz. The woman epitomises dignity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Katherine Fletcher
We need more straight-talking, lager-drinking politicians like her. One of the few who hasn’t been seduced by microphones and column inches, she expresses amused puzzlement at the trappings of power and the way most of her colleagues carry on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jess Phillips
Whether she’s cracking jokes on Have I Got News for You or reading out the annual list of women killed by men on International Women’s Day, she always sounds like a real human being. Plus she’s done a few cracking photoshoots over the years.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Penny Mordaunt
She’s always had it, but the sword has kicked things up a few notches.

 

 

 

 

 

Tracey Crouch
Betting or fan-led reviews, she’s always up to something away from the current parliamentary zeitgeist and getting it sorted. I’ve also seen her in the Women’s Parliamentary Football Team kit (she’s captain) and her legs are incredible. See too her co-captain, Hannah Bardell, who seems able to pull off any short haircut and is the only MP I know of who has done keepie uppies in the Chamber.

 

 

Emily Thornberry
I met her on the set of Laura Kuenssberg’s first Sunday show, which we did alongside Joe Lycett, and couldn’t resist her cool husky voice, dry sense of humour and near boredom with proceedings.

 

 

 

Theresa May
This is specifically the post-PM TM, where public dancing isn’t mandatory. She’s unassumingly gotten on with life as a back bencher – and special recognition must go to casually voting on her successor’s future as leader of the party in a ball gown.

 

 

Gillian Keegan and Vicky Atkins
This pair of Cabinet ministers have the same warmth, fun and frankness (maybe a bit too frank of late, in GK’s case) that we need more of. Snappy dressers, great hair and they both smell amazing.

 

 

 

Saqib Bhatti
I challenge you to find a politer, more earnest MP – or a snappier dresser. Bhatti quietly gets on with it, which somewhat goes against the grain of his 2019 intake. He’s a walking example of “the good guy gets the girl/job” – something many of his colleagues could do with taking to heart.

 

 

 

 

 

Richard Drax
The only other man I’ve singled out from the Conservative MPs, a group that requires very little encouragement in this area. Drax does, though, have a certain rizz – namely that of a Bond villain. He’s got Rupert Campbell-Blackish looks, bucketloads of cash and a secret quadruple-barrelled name. He’s also unusual amongst his peers in that he can’t be bought off with jobs or honours or threats, making him very hard to whip. Wahey…

 

 

Liz Saville Roberts
Have you heard her voice? She’s like the female Jeremy Irons. 

 

 

 

 

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